• 18Feb, 2019

Do you recall yourself as a teenager? Do feelings like confusion, wanting to fit in and myriad thoughts dominate your memories? This is what teenagers go through most of the times. From changing physique and thought processes, to making career choices, there is a lot happening with them all of a sudden. In a situation where they are going through hormonal changes and in their quest to establish their own identity, it is normal for them to behave a little differently. And even though we understand this, it could sometimes become difficult to keep pace with young teenagers and their temperaments. A flashback into our teenage years will go a long way in helping teenagers at home cope up with the metamorphosis they are going through. One day at a time should be the mantra.

Tween to Teen

Every tween is bubbling with mixed emotions to step into their golden Teenage years. Even young tweens between 8 and 12 years begin to show signs of changing from childhood to the tumultuous life of a teenager. The tween age is also an indication to parents that you have start looking at your child as a young adult, a friend. The years of moulding will soon be gone, your little child will no more be little. They have a mind and understanding of their own which has shaped out over their early childhood experience. They are waiting in their wings to set out, explore and experience. As parents, we have to prepare ourselves to accommodate a young adult in our lives, give them the freedom of space and thought to explore, be a friend, philosopher and guide. Take care to listen, be a sounding board for your teenager and not an opinion maker.

Teenage- The Fun years

Teenage is a time when your child wants to set free. They want to take their first flight of freedom. It is their quest to experience, to create their identity and at the same time the need to ‘fit in’ into their peer group that marks the life of every teenager. Their need for your supportive warmth and emotional anchor in their tumultuous years is at its peak. As parents, you are also experiencing a shift in your parenting role. Build up a new bond, give in to their harmless demands but know when to be firm. You are walking the tight rope, so strike a balance when to let go and when to stay firm. It is much better to let them involve themselves into the temporary teenage fads. Save your objections for real problems.

Continuous schooling

One thing that teenagers don’t like for sure is constant schooling. You don’t have to pester them with continuous career, academic or moral advices. Talk to them about such things once in a while but not so frequently that it will start to bug them.

Be the ice breaker- Talk to them

Most teenagers do not feel like sharing things with their parents and this is largely because there isn’t enough communication. Be there to break the ice every once in a while, because you too have been there and done that!!! Give your teenager an environment where they can express themselves without the fear of being judged. Also, make them aware that you are behind them, rock strong. Let them not be apprehensive of sharing their experiences with you, the good, bad and the ugly.

Put yourself in their shoes

It is journey of coping up, both for you and your teenager. Be soft on yourself too! Empathise with your teenager, be a silent spectator and fight the urge to be a helicopter parent. Do not forget, you can always fall back on the Chicken Soup for the Parent’s Soul and head massage while your young teen is out exploring!! Pick up one of the Chicken Soup series for your tween and teen too!! It is time to twin with you teen!!! Afterall, for a parent who has survived 3 am feedings and back-to-school blues successfully, you are sure to sail through this phase too!!!

Happy Parenting!!!

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